Later that night, after the streetlights blinked on and the neighborhood tucked itself in, I made the call. It was quick, clipped, and straight to the point.
“We’ve got a situation,” I said. “Civilian interference. Property tampering. Might want to send someone in the morning.”
There was a short pause on the other end, followed by a low, calm response: “Understood.”
Click.
Jack glanced at me from the other end of the living room. “They’re sending someone?”
I nodded. “Yep. Early.”
Jack stretched his arms over his head and grinned. “Good. I want her to be wide awake when it happens.”
The sun hadn’t fully risen when we stepped outside the next morning. Then, right on cue, the black SUV rolled around the corner and came to a slow stop in front of Lindsey’s house.
The driver’s door opened, and a man stepped out. He was dressed in a tailored black suit, crisp white shirt, and shiny shoes that barely made a sound as he crossed the street. Even in the early light, he wore dark sunglasses.
He paused beside me and gave a slight nod. I returned it.
Together, we walked across the street and stepped up onto Lindsey’s front porch. I rang the doorbell.
After a few seconds, the door creaked open.
Lindsey stood there in a fluffy pink bathrobe, a mess of blonde hair piled on her head, and a white mug clutched in both hands that read: Live, Laugh, Love.
She blinked hard as she took us in. “Um… hello?”
The agent didn’t smile. He reached into his jacket, pulled out a slim leather wallet, and opened it, flashing a badge and ID.
“Ma’am,” he said calmly, “due to your actions yesterday morning, you are now under investigation for interfering with an active undercover federal operation.”
The color drained from Lindsey’s face. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
“I—I don’t understand,” she said finally. “What operation?”
“You initiated the towing of two marked government vehicles,” the agent continued, tone still level and formal. “You disrupted and compromised two embedded federal officers in the process.”
“I didn’t know!” she stammered. “I mean—I thought—I was just trying to follow the HOA rules!”
“You failed to verify the vehicles before initiating their removal,” he replied, without blinking. “As a result, you delayed and damaged an active federal investigation. The costs and losses caused by your actions total twenty-five thousand dollars.”
Her mouth dropped open. The mug slipped from her hands and hit the porch with a loud crash, shattering into pieces.
Jack stepped forward then, hands in his hoodie pockets. “Maybe next time,” he said dryly, “don’t act like the sheriff of suburbia.”
She looked down at the broken mug like it might explain how this had all gone so wrong.
The agent gave a slight nod. “You’ll be contacted by our office for further action. Until then, you are not to leave the area. Do not contact anyone involved. Do not destroy any documents or records.”
She nodded, barely. Her mouth still hung open.
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